I posted these stories in 2012 and felt each message is still valid. Have a great weekend and look for a message from our very own Bagwan this Monday!
NEIGHBORHOOD RALLIES BEHIND FLYING TURTLES
Well for shit’s sake! As if things weren’t bad enough in today’s politically correct, tree hugging, helmet wearing, soccer loving, global warming, vegetable eating, carbon foot printed, nipple clamped, condom wearing, Obama loving, sea kitten touting, PETA donating, nanny state voting, panty wearing son of a bitch we now have to face flying Turtles!
Some asshole duct taped a Box Turtle to helium balloons and set him adrift. The poor critter got hung up in a tree. My hell how could this happen in America! A hysterical woman sobbed, “The ‘poor’ animal just kept moving its little arms and legs trying to escape his nightmare.” Finally in a code 3 siren blaring arrival the fire truck skidded to a stop.
My God man the authorities are going house to house with torches and pitch forks looking to lynch somebody! When it was all said and done the City of Oceanside, CA will have spent $100K tilting at this PETA inspired windmill! It’s no friggin wonder California is bankrupt!
Some poor sap living in New Zealand is jailed for 6 months for tossing an Ostrich egg at his wife. I had to read the article. He got pissed when his wife’s pet pig ran amuck and damaged his power saw. It went on to say “Russell, 46, had repeatedly asked his wife to keep the pet pig under control as it had damaged their home, a neighbor’s house and council property, but she insisted it should be given free range!” AND THEY GAVE HIM 6 MONTHS??????????
Let’s see, letting a pig wander destroying property and finally gets rebuked, rebuffed, and wears an Ostrich omelet? You got to wonder about the New Zealand justice system as they obviously sentenced the wrong person! Jeez.
Russell’s defense? He expected her to catch the 5lb egg…..