ZUKI WITNESSES THE PRICE OF FREEDOM…..just joe girds his loins

Cush''s half brother
Cush”s half brother

Good Morning Disambiguating Pacifists,

Hunter S. Thompson, who had his ashes shot from a cannon once said, “I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they’ve always worked for me.”  I would suggest that this somewhat cynical observation is a truer representation of mankind’s place on this rock than you may realize.

I read a brief news release that a FOX affiliate station news crew was robbed while shooting a story about the lottery.  It took place in a poor neighborhood convenience store in Hayward, CA.  This seems to be more fallout from Ferguson and Staten Island as it’s become justification for violence and mayhem.  I’m not sure if FOX was singled out here because the typically liberal press’s lead-in to every report was “White police officer kills unarmed black man” with zero context adding fuel to an already volatile situation.  FOX on the other hand simply let images of looting and barbarisms speak for themselves.  Speculation aside, should you wish to read it use the link below:


The two or three of you still reading this mis-fire are no doubt thinking, “Zuki….don’t you know all lives matter”?  I’m hip.  In the words of the late Rodney King, who by the way took on a half-dozen of LAPD’s finest beating him senseless with batons, “Can’t we all just get along?”

I want to be on record as saying I believe that in a perfect world the 5th Dimension’s ‘Age of Aquarius’ would be sung by Nuns & children all day…singing:

“…Harmony and understanding

Sympathy and trust abounding

No more falsehoods or derisions

Golden living dreams of visions

Mystic crystal revelation

And the minds true liberation…”


Aquarius, Aquarius!


While a beautiful thought borne of the 60’s and Woodstock, but fear IT’S JUST NOT POSSIBLE!  Certainly the majority of human beings would prefer to live in peace, but historically there’s always been enough greedy, self-absorbed, maniacal, and/or just plain evil people around that will not allow others to live in accord.  This is precisely why we maintain armies and a local police force in that it offers our best chance of maintaining our way of life.

Sometimes despite our best intentions though, it all turns to shit.  This was evidenced at Blondie’s last night during the shift change.  Our fellow ‘Rules Committee’ member Just JOE had closed his tab and was going to retrieve his coat when he was approached by two pincushions posing as thugs; all tatted up now bravely accosting a 67 year old man!

Sensing imminent danger Dawn our omnipresent bar tender called the police located a mere 5 blocks away to prevent harm to our dear associate.  Pushing JJ around like a cat toying with its prey the ex-L.U.R.P. had a little surprise for ‘Mutt & Jeff.’  Summoning up every square inch of gastric bile and methane his body contained, JJ unleashed a mixture of gas and putrefied fecal bits and sprayed both like a cornered Skunk!

This sent our brave little boys to their knees palming their faces screaming for a towel.  Obviously this fell on deaf ears!  The entire bar relieved JJ was no longer threatened began to laugh and circled around the two befouled idiots until the police arrived.  Cuffed and humiliated they were led out while JJ got a standing ovation.  Tipping his soiled Bronco cap to all he turned and walked out the door.

It was unfortunate though that the aftermath was displayed as a huge stain in the back of his trousers.  This is the price we pay to maintain our freedoms.  God Bless You Just JOE…


  • bagwan1

    I have known Just Joe since freshman year of high school and I want to tell you that I do not appreciate your using him as a vehicle for your attempt at scatological “humor.” I can vouch for his unblemished record of having never soiled his khaki’s in over 50 years with the exception of that one time in Geometry class.