BAGWAN AND 19TH AMENDMENT…..lift’s political burden from women

Did you bring the cigars?
Did you bring the cigars?

Good Morning Frissons of Hope,

The Bagwan has again come down from his temple shrouded by clouds in the Mystic Mountains to share his vision of the electoral processes.  If you’ll read his enlightened words to the finish only then will you see his vision.  If you’re a woman thinking of going into politics this is a MUST read so please enjoy:

This election can’t come soon enough. The nonstop lying and hypocrisy make Curmudgeon Corner look mild by comparison. Under the heading of “You can’t make this stuff up:” “This past week President Obama railed against the influence of billionaires like the evil Koch Bros on the Republican Party. This speech took place at a Democratic fundraiser held at the $23 million mansion of billionaire Rich Richman”… Rich Richman?

Every day we are bombarded with ads from our own Senator Mark Uterus which explain the horrendous things that will happen to women if we replace him with Republican Cory Gardner. This is all part of the campaign nationwide by Democrats warning us of the Republican “War on Women.” They are so wedded to that theme that the Democratic male candidate for Senate in Iowa uses the boiler plate “War on Women” ads against his Republican female opponent.

Of course this is mostly about abortion which has been a matter of settled law here in the US since 1973 with the Roe v. Wade decision. In the 41 years following that decision there have been plenty of powerful people who have opposed abortion (including 3 Presidents). Still nothing much has changed. Now we are to believe that without Senator Uterus abortions will be banned, birth control will be unavailable and who knows what other evils Republicans will rain down on helpless females.

It is hard to imagine that there are enough women who will be swayed by this to turn an election. Of course it was also hard to believe that women gave Bill Clinton a pass on how he treated his wife while simultaneously despising George W. who by all accounts is a great husband and father to his two daughters. In fact without the huge majority of women’s votes neither Clinton nor Obama would have been elected.

I think I have a solution to this. By “this” I am referring to the endless barrage of “War on Women” ads and women selecting horseshit presidents like the current buffoon. The solution is right there under your nose but things like this take a Bagwan to see: Repeal the 19th Amendment! That’s right; take away their right to vote and you take away the need for those mindless ads.  Repealing an amendment to the Constitution is difficult but we did it with the 18th Amendment. Repealing Prohibition was a serious and necessary action, but no more so than taking away the vote from a group which is ill-equipped to use it judiciously. You don’t let children run with scissors in their hand, do you?

The 18th Amendment was ratified in 1919 and the 19th followed in 1920. That’s right the two most dastardly Amendments in the history of this great nation happened in back to back years. That might not be a coincidence. The lack of alcohol precipitated by the 18th could have led directly the lack of judgment shown in ratifying the 19th.

No matter the cause it is time to move forward and what better goal to set than repeal by the 100 year anniversary in 2020. We will call the campaign our “20/20 Vision” which will free the poor dears from the confusion of voting and allow them to focus on the functions which they were designed to perform.

Bagwan

  • zuki

    Gadzooks! I’d reconsider….that may create a backlash as unintended consequences! I fear mass vomiting but may be the impetus the campaign needs….only time will tell. I’ve got Kimberley’s cell number so let me know if you change your mind.

  • zuki

    Superbowl….Katy Perry…? Forged commitment? I think you’re onto something perhaps you could persuade Dana Perino and Kimberly Guilfoyle to wear the 20/20 Vision plunging wet T-shirt all year on their Fox show leading up to the showdown in Congress.

    • bagwan1

      No can do on the Kimberly/Dana T-shirt request.
      I have convinced Whoppi and Rosie to be photographed naked from the waist down — just think about that for a minute.

  • zuki

    One can only imagine your state of mind at the time, The 20/20 Vision campaign is underfunded and pretty sure T-shirts & caps won’t be enough to stem the tide of indifference! Although I’m pretty stoked about your death threat….pretty cool eh?

    • bagwan1

      T-shirts and caps are just the beginning. I have already forged JJ’s name to a Super Bowl ad commitment. Also Katy Perry who is appearing at halftime at the Super Bowl has agreed to wear 20/20 apparel during her performance.
      Katy is what anti-suffragettes look like, as opposed to suffragettes who are pictured below

  • bagwan1

    As a result of posting this piece I have received death threats this evening from a woman.
    Actually the more I think about it the voice reminded me more of Zuki singing “Staying Alive.”
    No matter, we will fight on — especially if JJ gets us some “20/20 Vision” T-shirts.