LIFE’S RICH PAGAENT ON BENDED KNEE…….zuki discovers being double jointed!

cartilage-1Good Morning Denizens,

Words don’t adequately describe how good it feels when it stops killing me! I think it’s been well established over the years that full knee replacement carries with it 6 weeks of 24/7 pain.  Never one to toot my own horn (much), and with a bit of self-congratulatory fanfare I must admit I’ve gone through the last two weeks like a man. No sniveling, minimal whining, with gritted teeth and the girding up of my loins I faced my Physical Therapist (Dannie) directly in the eye and asked her to do her worst!

This may have been a mistake…

Oh and should you find yourself going down this osteoarthritic road, swallow your pride and go ahead and get a walker with the tennis balls. You’re already pretty conspicuous sliding along in a walker, at least the tennis balls keeps the noise to a minimum! You won’t regret it…

As most know, a full knee replacement takes weeks of physical therapy to reacquire one’s full range of movement. It also means one must dig deep and push yourself beyond the immediate pain until it grabs you by your collar and is in your face! If it isn’t killing you it’s doing you little good.

I think I’ll let the above suffice as I still have 4 weeks of inflicted pain ahead of me and must leave room for the occasional whimpering.

While it’s good to be back and I appreciated all the well-wishers and those who lied indicating they missed me, but it didn’t take long for ‘work’ to become ‘work’ again only now with two additional weeks of tweaking and follow up. Now the leg is throbbing as I left the Oxycodone at home and initiating my formal withdrawal from this wonderful drug!

I suppose had I followed the instructions implicitly the ugly bout with constipation could have been avoided. But if you’re like me, and I truly hope you’re not, when it says take two per day for pain, I automatically assume four would be much better, and it always is!!!  However, the eight days of holding back the wall of fecal material have its own special reward and was an additional adaptation on top of the general misery that already enveloped my existence.

For the two or three of you still reading this ‘schlemiel’ I’d encourage each of you to locate that deep-seated spot in your heart reserved for the more charitable and selfless things in your life and contribute to the “Zuki’s New Knee Symposium and Salad Bar Re-Hab.

The $200 per plate includes Cush’s famous Walleye Puree and bean dip, Leg of Lamb w/mint cucumbers and shredded carrots, Kale, and a heaping helping of ‘Pig Ear” stew! Tickets are going fast…..