YOU CAN NEVER GO BACK…..zuki discovers being dead in the water

dog-crusty-mudge2Good Morning Merchants of Sunshine,

The more I tunnel around in ‘life’s rich pageant’ the more it remains the same.  Sifting through the mud and dirt to find a nugget always require my hands get dirty which of course is half the story.  Behind the scenes research, checking facts, risking physical harm, and an unyielding need to find truth drive the ‘diatribe’ to be one of the more absolute sources for nuggets.  This empire wasn’t built on whim or hope.  It took axle grease and hard nosed determination to build Marzukionline into the preeminent journalistic blog on human behavior!

I’m somewhat reluctant to even bring this up but since we’re on the topic of how I’m doing, the fact I was nominated for the “Blunderbuss Award” seemed relevant.  For those of you unfamiliar with this prestigious gush over talent, it’s awarded each year for the web’s most prolific blogger.  I don’t expect to win as I’ve never come close to hitting the lotto, but flattered to be included on the list of 3,000 candidates.

That’s enough about the award; it’s really nothing and I beseech you to never speak of it again.  There’s bigger fish to fry and as usual it’s up to me to direct traffic.  Its times like these I miss the slurring reprehensible blathering of ‘Poo,’ ‘The late Gigem’s’ Texas spun machinations, SAK’s never ending ‘gay’ references, the drunken wisdom of the ‘Bagwan,’ and Joe’s stoic sarcasm. Life time members of the ‘rules’ committee, their collective disappearance from among us has had a notable effect.  Like the economy, laughter is down 30% and has cut me to the quick.

I can’t put a finger on it but Blondie’s has become a different place.

While there have been moments of spontaneous mirth from what’s left of our corner, over all though we miss our associates who’ve for whatever reason decided to distance themselves from us.  It’s been a gradual bit by bit degradation but is now acute.  My prolix style aside, I’m no doubt part of the problem but have no way of knowing if it’s repairable.  My theory is simple.  Most men left with cognitive thought will go through bouts of self-loathing.  Doesn’t matter the level of success and/or failure he achieves, rather it’s the question of what could have been done differently?

Its sackcloth and ashes!  I drink too much, show no patience, got stoned instead of calling a sibling, and didn’t get that dream house on the beach.  We tend to itemize our weaknesses.  Did I spend enough time with my children?  Why do I continue to put things off until forced to act?  I should call my mother more often!  This self-flagellation seems to worsen during the holidays, but that’s not the point. The point is I’m in dire need of a good laugh…..a beer out your nose guffaw!

At the height of ‘curmudgeon corner’ when we were running on all cylinders, the odds of spontaneity breaking out and witty aphorisms bringing tears of laughter was very good.    For those of you that actually know these people it’s easy to understand what I’m attempting to say, but for the two or three of you reading this piffle the first time, trust me these people are smart, charming, and funny.  Since their slithering away unannounced, I experience that kind of humor rarely.  I think it has much to do with the dour mood permeating our fair Blondie’s.  Please understand this rant has nothing to do with those of us that still congregate there as the remaining committee members can be funny.  ‘I’m just saying’ we were better collectively than individually!

Always brings to mind Jon McLaughlin song you can never go back.

And you can never go back 
To Avalon 
Stolen with the bold and the beautiful 
Those days are gone 
Don’t you know those days are gone 
And you can never go back