BAGWAN DISCOVERS OBSOLESCENCE….is surprised by his own

zuki's mountain retreat
zuki’s mountain retreat

Good Morning Rust Buckets,

Once again our very own Bagwan has grown tired of we the unwashed and our struggle for relevance.  He rolled away the stone (with help from Local #720 Labor Union) and condescended to visit with us regarding our pending obsolescence.  While in general most ‘Holy Men’ gain their spirituality and oneness with the universe from nature, i.e., peyote buttons, magic mushrooms, weed, and licking frogs, while our very own Bagwan uses wine to see beyond the vale.  Please sit down and relax….enjoy:


Zuk’s prior post about my encounter with the Cherry Creek version of Cliff Clavin was remarkably accurate. It is also remarkable that when Shakespeare wrote about someone being “hoisted on his own petard” he was anticipating the invention of the I-phone. Sure enough, Cliff was intending to injure me with his phone and instead it blew up right in his own hand.

Is instantaneously available information going to spell the end of Cliff Clavins — probably not? Ignorance supports its beholder with an incredible resilience and strength. My Cliff was dazed and maybe even embarrassed, but my guess is that he is somewhere in an Irish pub buying rounds of Guinness and Jameson’s for the locals and boring them to death with his encyclopedic knowledge of American football. Don’t change your story just change your venue.

Technology has been making people and things obsolete since the beginning of time. It is worth noting that the obsolete person or object doesn’t always go away. Take the fireman on steam locomotives. Even after the railroads had completely transitioned from steam to diesel and there was no coal to shovel, the unions were successful at keeping a fireman on train crews for another 40 or 50 years. Unions are very good at that sort of thing as anyone who has met Cush can attest.

It’s not just fireman on the railroad; there are no elevator operators, footman or galley slaves. I think JJ was one of the last drummer boys in the military and I still wonder how long he can make a go of selling subscriptions to the Saturday Evening Post. Come to think of it everyone on Curmudgeon Corner already is or is about to become obsolete – with the exception of Rodger the Hairdresser. Certain jobs are here to stay. Bartender and hooker are two more that immediately come to mind. Although you could make the case that Zuki’s blow-up sex slave is a form of technology that has taken business away from the local working girls.

“Luddite” is the word for people who fight innovation because they fear that their jobs will be eliminated. I remember 20 years ago when my company first bought us IBM laptops I was slow to adapt. 20 years ago an IBM laptop had more weight than computing power so when I was asked at a corporate sales meeting how I was using mine I responded:  “As a door stop.” I still wasn’t technically a Luddite however since my fear wasn’t that my job was going to be eliminated. My fear was that my job was going to be prolonged.

Times change and some of us go along with the flow. It wasn’t that long ago that people thought Jon Stewart was a comedian and Brian Williams was a journalist. Now, unfortunately, people take Stewart seriously and laugh at Brian.  Or how about Bill Cosby, remember when he used to make us laugh with Fat Albert? We’re still chuckling but for different reasons now.  It turns out that Bill was using knockout pills on women who were perfectly willing to have sex with him consensually. He apparently just preferred his women in a mute and inert state (I get the mute part).

That reminds me of a joke which maybe comes from Woody Allen:

This couple was leaving the Court House after finalizing their divorce when the husband says, “What do you say we get a hotel room and have sex just once more for old times’ sake.” “Over my dead body” she snarls. “Hey why not, that’s the way we always did it before.” (rim shot).


  • zuki

    I realize there’s not enough time nor the inclination to list everyone and everything stumbling toward obsolescence, but the Bagwan makes a valid point. Obsessed with the ‘Rat Pack’, film noirs, and Katherine Hepburn the Bagwan seems primed to fade to black. According to feminists, JJ being one of them says “all men are obsolete!” WTF?