Good Morning Agents of Good Intentions,

For the two or three of you reading this Pork Loin on a beautiful Saturday morning, you should go ahead and shoot yourselves! 

I thought it only fair and fitting to announce, particularly after all the whining and complaining, that I had a temporary lack of judgment yesterday and drank a lousy canned Bud-Light with Cush.  While no drunken sloppy ugliness ensued, nevertheless I was weak.  I’ve been doing ‘sack cloth and ashes’ all morning to punish myself for this ‘turned to jello’ moment. 

Pile on if you must, I certainly deserve it.  But I think the image says it all don’t you?


  • Just JOE

    ZUKI’s “ART” can assume many forms
    It often hovers o’er most critical norms
    He can draw anything
    “Throw”… sculpt… dance and sing
    But it’s his Uber-BS that really informs!

    ZUKI’s “ART” is meant to impact us
    If that’s positive… It’s just a BIG plus
    When viewing his “ART”
    Just look for one part
    You’ll know it’s a “MarZUKI” by the cactus!

  • zuki

    For those that don’t know our Bagwan, the fact he outed the eventual winner from his trifecta because he was ‘talked’ into replacing it with ‘Daddy Nose Best’ is truly ‘poetic justice’ in the most literal of definitions.  Typically it’s our Bagwan that draws people away from decisions made!  Can I have an amen?    

    Yes Ada I drew it with all credit going to the late Don Martin of Mad Magazine fame.

  • Ada

    Zuki I love your cartoon!  Did you draw it?

  • Just JOE

    Every year, The Bagged ONE plays the “Rail Bird”
    Divining from charts who’s first, second, and third
    Did he cash this year’s play?
    We’ve not heard him say
    Whether he solved the puzzle of the 20-nag herd!

    • Bagwan

      As always I picked 5 trying to hit the trifecta. After finishing my initial work which includes reading prior performances and watching prep races on video I had selected I’ll Have Another, Bodemister, Dullahan, Creative Cause and Alpha. My final step was to go to the Daily Racing Form website and read and listen to the “experts.”
      I held firm on picking Bodemister over the other favorite Union Rags even though many preferred Union Rags and almost all said you had to have both. I held firm on Dullahan even though most said he was only good on artificial surfaces and turf.
      I was talked into Daddy Nose Best and since I only use 5 horses in my trifecta box I had to eliminate one of my five picks. Those who know me will find great irony in the horse I abandoned — the winner, I’ll Have Another.

      The trifecta with I’ll Have Another, Bodemister and Dullahan paid $3065. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve said, “I’ll have another” since the end of the race.

  • fez

    It’s obvious to us here at accounts receivable that the Bagwan reached out to the wrong people at Churchill Downs. Yet he resolved to do the right thing by swearing off stable boys while seeking counseling for anger management. We would expect nothing less from a holy man (except the oblique reference to the crime) and way to go with the timing, it’s plain to see you did your homework. Please keep the blunt objects at home and better luck next year.

  • zuki

    My God….Goober is dead!  They’re dropping like flies!  Speaking of flies, they’ve identified the body found right after the Derby.  Adan Fabian Perez, a Guatemala native worked at the track and police are investigating the tragedy as a ‘homicide.’  Alicia Smiley, spokeswoman for Louisville Metro Police, said that the victim ”did sustain injuries that lead us to believe he was involved in some type of altercation.” Our own Bagwan did poorly on Derby Day and is considered a “person of interest” in the matter.

    • Bagwan

      Assuming Mr. Perez is an undocumented worker, the investigation will run out of steam when the Detectives take their lunch break today.
      In an unrelated matter the Bagwan promises not to change his original picks based on tips from stable boys and also to attend anger management classes.

  • Bagwan

    George Lindsey, ‘Goober Pyle’ Dies At 83

  • Bagwan

    Posted: Sun May 6, 2012 10:12AM; Updated: Sun May 6, 2012 11:53AMPolice: Homicide at Churchill DownsRead more:

  • Bagwan

    In our most recent comments on the prior posting fez and I both had wishes for Zuki. fez wished for a dry weekend and we now know that isn’t going to happen. I wished he would find a dry vagina and with about 36 hours left in the weekend there is still a chance.
    Today we have Cinco de Mayo, the Kentucky Derby and my grandson’s First Communion. I have sent my wife to Cleveland for the First Communion, Zuki and JJ are going to be cruising Federal, so I guess I am left with celebrating the Derby. My picks are in and all I am waiting to hear is “They’re all in line …… and they’re off for the 138th running of the Kentucky Derby.”