ROAD RAGE KARMA….zuki double-downs and craps out

Good Morning Demotic Commuters,

Never one to hold anything back, today’s chapter of life’s rich pageant is a doozy.  After scrapping the windows I climbed in the old Camry and headed east.  The brisk air filled my lungs and given it was Friday I had an extra spring in my step!  As I always do I headed south on I-25 accelerating to blend with traffic when I heard a disturbing sound.  It’s one of those sounds you just know will be expensive and no doubt bring misfortune.  The sound became deafening as I approached Orchard and decided to pull off when all hell broke loose.  BAM! Fappita fappita fappita…….then metal on asphalt–the right rear tire exploded nearly throwing me into the retaining wall.  I was spared certain death only by my expert driving skills.  Jacking it up and fetching the lug nuts I was ready to pull the destroyed rim off but found I couldn’t.  I kicked, pulled, and beat it with the lug wrench but still couldn’t budge it.  As if on cue I began swearing raising my fist to the heavens asking if this was all God had “C’mon I can take it” I shrieked pounding my chest.  He/She never answers my prayers (even sincere honest ones) but wouldn’t you know it this time God delivered on my request.  I had left the keys in the ignition and of course it was locked.  When I pulled on the driver’s side door handle it immediately broke off…… AGAIN!!  I was truly so aggravated I considered stepping in front of the next speeding car.  It actually felt good to smash the rear passenger window with the lug wrench so I could snag my keys; almost cathartic.  Stained and angry I stormed down the off ramp in a huff muttering to myself so God wouldn’t hear and found the Double Tree Hotel to clean up and find some help.

Thankfully, I found someone willing to answer their phone at 6:30 AM so within an hour of my misfortune I was on my way to work less $65.  Ironically the repair guy asked me about the window and said, “Wow too bad we’re equipped to handle that” giving me a look I’d give to a fellow moron.  It cost me $230 to replace the window I smashed in anger!  Stupid….stupid…..stupid!  When you add the $180 it will cost to replace the two rear tires not including taxes, the entire morning will add up to about $475!  Just when I thought hunkering down was behind me, I get high jacked again.  I suppose I can chalk it up to my ongoing lesson in humility.  Can I have an Amen? 

zuki

  • Bagwan

    We all know that Zuki is prone to manufacture the truth but there is now abundant reason to believe that this story is true in it’s entirety. I can’t even imagine how horrible a morning this might have been.
    Having said all that, I find myself more concerned about the plight of this poor girl in the picture.

  • Bagwan

    I think we have to thank our lucky stars that this all happened on 11-11-11 which probably minimized the damage. Just imagine when we set Zuki loose on 13-13-13.

  • Just G & P JJOOAA

    I just love it when a plan comes together!