Good Morning Haile Selassie Where Ever You Are,
“Lion of Judah” aside, how’s everything working out so far?
There’s been a rumor floating around that Dewey’s, home to ‘Curmudgeon Corner’ for nearly seven years, is failing financially. Given the slow economy and from my own observations, estimate my beloved drinking establishment is down 35% from previous years. Even football season saw a severe drop off of drunken TV screamers. Certainly there’s been some belt tightening, mostly in the form of managers taking shifts away from bartenders that understood the symbiotic nature of pouring drinks. As much as I hate to see it, these measures are probably sensible ones. But when a business begins to bounce checks to new employees, it’s truly a bad sign.
I have a high degree of respect for those who can make a business run and thrive as I’ve failed twice in that endeavor. But as a consumer I feel I have a fiduciary responsibility to my associates and to a large degree, those 197 of you that no doubt have a favorite place to self medicate. Our time spent drinking in public and socializing over trivia and the events of the day is very important in our collective lives. This 2-3 hours of alcohol induced activity never has to be put on a day timer or to-do list, rather is ‘sensed’ when it’s time to imbibe. These rumors of Dewey’s imminent demise not only affect those that work there, but it creates uncertainty about our future as well! WHAT’S IN IT FOR US!?
To do a little housekeeping, there was an emergency meeting of the ‘Rules Committee’ where it was decided that in the matter of fez vs Dv’ant four move match, that regardless of Dv’ant’s ass-hole-ish behavior, technically he was correct. The onus is on fez to make the next move or otherwise there’ll be endless tauntings and Lord knows I’m a peace-maker. The Committee also empowered Dv’ant and yours truly to scout for alternate locations. Our assignment was primarily to trivia bars, assess local talent, food, pricing, proximity from work, and the inevitable trip home. As a reward for our efforts we’d surely trounce the local trivia players and besmirch their leader-board. As it turned out though, the local talent was up to the challenge and we could only post one score. Dv’ant sucked!
Speaking for what few associates are left, juntas are something we take seriously. Over the years these tests of will have been an effective tool to leverage our position as patrons. There are serious doubts about making it work today. When we moved en mass from Kahuna’s to Dewey’s it had serious economic consequences because it involved 8 – 10 of us! Within two weeks, the abandoned bar literally begged us to return and offered us the ‘perfect’ place for committee meetings. We immediately returned and enjoyed heaven on earth until the place was shut down by the IRS. My point is as a group we could demand things, but the pitiful few of us clinging to Dewey’s for our basic needs hardly represent the same threat. The dynamics have noticeably changed in our clubhouse as management no longer recognizes our contribution. This is tragically demonstrated time after time when they (management) allow a hockey game in Philadelphia requested by a single first-time patron override the many regulars and turn our music off to air the game commercials and all! As a loyal patron this action was a proverbial bitch slapping. When I approach management to protest, they condescendingly reply, “This is a Sports Bar” and walk away. I can’t speak for the rest of my associates, but I think it’s time to start from scratch.